I was online paying a fucking redlight ticket and figured I would update since it's been a while. (of course) I don't have time for this shit. I need to take a shower because my baby will be here soon.

Things around the house are going shitty. Well, with my sister that is. I'm so dissapointed in her. I'm used to it know that I'm past dissapointment. I just don't even care anymore. She's hurt my mom over and over again. I'm not even going into detail because, well...it's not really any of ya'lls business unless I type everything about her in here. That's just a nice summary.

Don is dating a new nasty bitch. My sister and I would love to break her fucking nasty neck. She better leave the fucking kids alone. I'll step my fat ass in it.

Yes, I said fat. No, I'm not fat but if I don't get my ass to the doctor soon and find out what the hell is going on, I will be. I'm slowly inching up that way. I weight 147 now. I was 134-136 2 months ago. I don't know what's going on. I eat like I normally do. I'm not depressed. (when i get depressed I eat and sleep, I'm not doing that) NO MOTHER FUCKERS I'M PREGNANT! Just thought I'd throw that out there.

I finally got on insurance so I'm going to the doctor the 7th. Stomach pains, excessive discharge (yea I said), back pain (as always, nothing new), feeling sick all the time, gagging all the time, and gaining weight. I've checked, I've had my periods, I'm not pregnant. If I was...so be it. But I'm not thank God. I've got other priorities like that son I have now and my school. Maybe one day but not today.  Anyway, these problems have been going on since I started school. Maybe it's stressing because I'm constantly busy and feel like I never have a break. I don't know. I mean, I work from 7-3 Mon.-Fri. Sometimes until 4. Then tues-thurs. I go to school until 9 right after work and then I go to school all day on Sat. Sunday is my only day off and well, I clean then. (Sometimes, half of the time I'm too tired or trying to spend time with Andrew and Thomas)

Um...I'm getting a raise. Tina from work was running her mouth about shit trying to get me in trouble because I said I was going to put in a resume somewhere and then she runs around saying shit quitting. Stupid Chickfila bullshit as always. Tina is the main one who starts it. Well Kelly and I were having problems with her after she told Jerry on us about something we WERE NOT DOING, and Kelly went and requested a meeting with Jerry, told him everything that was going on, included my name, and got us a raise. If it ain't at least 50 cent it's not even worth talking about. Hopefully it will be more or at least that. I won't know until next week. Jerry pulled me to the side and talked to me and told me he was giving me a raise so it will help make up for the insurance I'm getting took out each paycheck.

Nothing else to say. Got things to do.

Amy I miss you too girl! Well, you know my schedule so...give me a call. I'll try to call you sometime soon. Everytime I think about it something comes up. I can't wait until I finish school.

Fuck my last post. I'm not going to go at it with someone through a diary. I sent an e-mail, got out my last words and that's all I had to say. Just like she did. I just get tired of shit after shit of nothing. Everything we do or say to each other or behind each others back is always assumed to be meant something than what it really is. We have different opinions on relationships. If I really care about a guy, like Thomas, I won't go anywhere without him because I can't stand it. Her, doesn't matter how much she cares about a guy she doesn't want to spend every minute with him. I'm not saying it's a bad thing. We're just different. She thinks I'm dissing her when I still wanted to hang out with her but have Thomas around too. I guess with some people you can't have both. We haven't gotten along for a long time. We both think we're stuck up bitches. We think we're the same things about each other but yet are so different. I don't know.  It just gets old after a while. It's like a relationship with her and I. One minute we're all over each other and the next min. we're fighting over something that was said or something takin the wrong way or something that was assumed, like the whole hair thing. I'm not talking shit, I got out what I had to say to her and that's in her e-mail, not posted on the interenet where everyone can read. Because one thing I am going to do, I'm going to be mature and not bash her over the internet trying to get other people against her. I don't do that to people. Well, not certain people. We have a past together. Good and bad but I just think it's time to let things go and go our seperate ways because it seems that the things we do piss each other off more and more.

Anyway, medicaid has stopped completely with Andrew and I. I'm a little scared to pay high doctor bills or get on insurance and pay high insurance but I hated being on that shit anyway. I don't want to say I'm too proud, but it's time that I try to handle that part on my own anyway. One step at a time. That's all I can do. I could get a car right now but I wouldn't have any money for Andrew and I can't do that to my child. I just have to be patient and I need insurance for my son so it puts me back farther on things I had planned but everything works the way it does for a reason. I'm happy and I'm not going to let anything small get in my way. I've been stressing a lot lately because over money and bills and health shit that's going on with me but I've got to stop. I know everything will work out. I've got to go through some bad to get to the good right? I have my son and Thomas to get my through it so, I know everything will be fine. It just sucks to work your ass off and sometimes it feels like it's for nothing but lil by little I get closer and closer to where I want to be.

I REALLY HATE IT, when people talk shit about other people in their xanga and think that it can't be read. I have ways bitch. You know who the fuck this is about. :) You don't talk shit about people behind their backs but your bitch ass has my name all up in your xanga and at the end says "She can't read this, but I need to rant." Yes the fuck I can! :)

You think I'm pissed off about your fucking hair because you didn't like it. I don't give a fuck. Like I said in that e-mail, I could be the one of the best and there are still going to be people that talk shit. It's YOU! Not the hair so grow the fuck up and stop accusing and assuming that the reason I hate your fucking guts is over your fucking nappy ass head.